One of the things that’s become more and more apparent to me as I go through this whole process is how easy it is to lose yourself in it, and find yourself obsessing more and more about every detail.  For instance, in my last post I mentioned that I had lost a stone and a half at my weekly weigh in.  All very good.  But I don’t only check my weight on the weekly weigh in.  Oh no, we’ve got a lovely new set of weightwatchers scales and they are far too enticing, sat there wantonly on the floor every time you go in the bedroom, beckoning you to jump on and see how you are doing.

And so you start to measure every day, sometimes two or three times during the day.  Absolutely pointless, of course, since during the day your weight fluctuates hugely, due in intake, output, exercise, fluid input etc.  And so you cannot stop checking something you know to be of no use to you.  But it’s like an addiction.

So anyway, the morning after my miraculous milestone in weight loss, I woke up and instinctively went on the scales, only to find to my horror that in a single day I had put on a pound and a half.  Normally this wouldn’t bother me, as I know this happens all the time, but on this day it really bugged me.  I had just hit my milestone damnit, and wasn’t about to see it go away again.  And besides, it was a weekend day, and so rather than simply muttering under my breath and getting ready to go to work, I had time for the argument to fester.  And then I spent the next half an hour trying to do anything I could to rid myself of this pound and a half.

Having lost a pound through the traditional methodology (sorry if this is starting to gross you out) I still had half a pound to go.  So I looked at my face, which was in need of a beard trim. Perfect.  And so I spent the next half an hour trimming my beard down, probably further than was strictly necessary (and leaving a slightly unfortunate chunk missing in the process) not because I needed a trim, but to see if it could put me over the edge, back to the weight that had given me so much pleasure the day before.

The weirdest thing of all this is that it actually worked, returning me to the glorious total of a day previous.  Totally ridiculous, of course, and it meant nothing in terms of the fact that my weigh in that counts was still a further six days ahead, but it goes to show the levels of crazy that this sort of challenge can do to you.

So anyway.  I am still trying to get to grips with what exactly this site is, now that it’s just me doing it.  I have some ideas, as well as the potential ‘big thing’ as mentioned in the last post.  I still don’t want to say too much, as I haven’t really made any final decisions, but in the meantime, there is a decision to be made about who I would be doing ‘this thing’ for in terms of charity, and I am looking for suggestions.  Most of you will know by now that this isn’t my main blog, and I’m looking at this issue a bot more over there.  If you have any thoughts or suggestions, please go here and let me know. (Yes, I know it’s a bit weird sending you from one blog to another, just roll with it, ok?)